Does the Catholic Church teach from the Bible?

There is a conspiracy, present since the 1st Century A.D., to say the Church isn’t the Church. I’d prefer to post this in a more general Religion
forum, but such a category is non-existent here. C’est la ATS.

The Bible: what does it mean to teach FROM the Bible? Well, in terms of the Catholic Church, which is the Church Christ founded, we must understand
two things:

1) The Church is the Bride of Christ.
2) The Church, being the Bride, is joined (2 become 1) to Christ, which is the understanding of No Salvation Outside the Church– being the Mystical
Body of Christ.
a) the Husband is visibly “away”, leaving the wife in charge.
b) the Husband is present, in a manner unseen vis-a-vis the Blessed Sacrament.
c) Not a single legitimate child can be the result of adultery or polygamy insofar as this example; ALL salvation is THROUGH the Church, which is to
say through Christ (Catechism of the Catholic Church #846): this is where it gets all abstract and nuanced, and the physical, earthly examples become
rather deficient lest we end up with Feeneyism (only visible Catholics go to heaven) or the more modern, and lacking, misunderstanding that people can
be saved BY their false religions rather than merely IN them. (See Baltimore Catechism #3 Questions 510-513, Catechism of Pope Saint Pius X Questions
27-29, and for the Society of Saint Pope Pius X lurkers: Chapter 10 of Open Letter to Confused Catholics by Abp. Marcel Lefebvre.)

So, what IS the Bible? Well, we might consider the Bible a love letter of sorts. Now, who better to translate/interpret a love letter to a wife and by
default all the children of said union (that’d be all joined to Christ in that mystical way), than the WIFE. Surely anyone who has ever written a
letter to someone, particularly a love letter, knows they often contain little phrases or understandings ONLY known to the person receiving it, right?

So, if you were to dig into grandma’s old cedar chest, and found all grandpa’s letters over the years, would you be able to decipher much of the
little things, and even more importantly, understand the context? Possibly, if grandpa was a complete simpleton, not romantic, and essentially a total
bore of a husband. But Our Lord, Christ, The Word, the HUSBAND is not only so multifaceted it takes this word called “eternal” to describe Him, but
He is also the most romantic husband ever (seriously, died for His Bride in the most horrific way ever to bring about children like [hopefully] you
and me), but [I]also[/I] is most awesome and definitely NOT boring. Have you seen a sunset, closed your eyes and smelled the spring, or heard the
harmony of notes together? Yeah, He made all that. So, you’d kinda expect the letters, combined in a book, to be necessarily interpreted by the
Bride: aka the Catholic Church.

Now, if you asked Grandma to interpret the letters, or rather, read them to you, it might result in a totally different understanding than you, or
another, reading them and trying to put together this story of grandpa and grandma. Duh.

What does St. John tell us first? He recaps the first few words of the book of Genesis:

In the beginning was the Word. And the Word was with God, and the Word WAS God.

But wait… was? Don’t you mean IS? Yeah. But we’re now dealing with an eternal concept in time. And who/what is the linear/time-based symbol of
God? Israel. And what was promised in Jeremiah 31:31? A New Covenant. And what does Romans 11 say about Israel? And what does Matthew 16 say about
this New Covenant’s leader? And what entity on earth has the successor of this leader? And who, then, is really the only qualified entity to teach
about the word of the Word?

The Catholic Church is the only qualified entity, who, in Her Glory via that of Her Husband (ya know, the whole 2 become 1 thing), explains this
awesome, giant love letter called the Holy Bible which is all about the unfathomable love of God after our physical first parents (Adam and Eve)
screwed up in direct contradiction to orders not to do so passing on Original Sin.

It’s beautiful, actually. But I didn’t get it until I listened to the Wife of the Husband.

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